Developing Kingdom Leaders – Tom Yeakley

Taking the Mystery out of Leadership

Archive for the month “July, 2025”

28 Jul 2025

Trusting Others

In Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT we read, “Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.  Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.”  Before we can trust people, we must trust in the Lord and His good and perfect plans for me and for us all.  People will constantly be giving us reasons not to trust them deeply, but if God reigns over all, I can forgive others quickly and move forward without being derailed by bitterness or a critical spirit.

But you say, “Yes, I do trust God deeply because He is good, sinless, and loves me unconditionally.  But that’s not true of people who are often looking out for their own good, do sin against me, and tend to love me only when I do what they approve of.”  I agree.  People can be hard to trust because trust is both given and earned.  And when trust is eroded due to untrustworthy behavior, it can be hard to trust again.  Forgiveness of those who wrong me is key to my freedom from bitterness.

Jesus addressed this when Peter asked Him about forgiving those who wronged him.  In Matthew 18:21-22 NLT we see, “Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?”  “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!” 

As we co-labor, we will often find others who act in ways that further their personal purposes without thinking about the broader impact on other co-laborers or our organization as a whole.  They may be very convinced about a certain way of ministry to accomplish our mission and vision that is different from yours.  These differences can cause a lack of trust and lead to judgmental attitudes and critical spirits.  Soon, factions and divisions form and trust is lost.

When moving to Indonesia many years ago, we were trained in the saying, “Not wrong, just different.”  Exposure to new cross-cultural norms could cause us to be condemning and critical of the host culture we were trying to impact for Christ.  Better to withhold judgement, be slow to speak and quick to listen, and remember that ‘wisdom is justified by all her children’ (see Luke 7:35).  More exposure and understanding can help us avoid a condemning attitude.

So, rather than presuming that ‘different’ is ‘wrong,’ ask questions with phrases like, “I see this, can you please help me understand…” Don’t presume motives or ignorance until you understand the new context better.  Position yourself as a learner to the new context and ask questions to gain better understanding.  Seek to understand rather than be understood.  Gaining a better understanding often clarifies the “why.”

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14 Jul 2025

Living and Leading at a Sustainable Pace – 2

Now concerning our brother Apollos, I strongly urged him to visit you with the other brothers, but it was not at all his will to come now. He will come when he has opportunity. 1 Corinthians 16:12 ESV

Note how in this passage Paul ‘strongly urged’ Apollos to go to Corinth to help address some pressing issues outlined in his letter to them. There was a very pressing need in Corinth. And besides this need, the Apostle Paul was also ‘pressing’ Apollos to go. Yet, despite all the pressure from different sides, Apollos refused to go at this time. He would come sometime in the future, but not now.

That decision took a lot of courage! That decision came from someone who would not be intimidated or driven by an urgent request – even though it was legitimate. Apollos knew that some others could and would go (it appears Titus carried the letter to Corinth – see 2 Corinthians 2:12-13). It just wasn’t going to be him at this time. He had his reasons.

Why do Kingdom leaders move to reaction leadership and a personal drivenness to achieve, rather than staying within their God-given boundaries and saying ‘no’ when appropriate? Here are some of the lies we believe that drive us to live and lead at an unhealthy, unsustainable pace.

o “Success in the ministry depends upon me.” We would never say this, but we often live like it!
o “True commitment equals busyness beyond the limits of normal.” You know, leaders are busy people!
o “If I don’t accept this task or opportunity, then I will be left out or considered uncommitted by others.” Their opinion of me really matters for my sense of well-being!
o “I must model a challenging pace to be a good example for those watching me.” What happens when they are not watching me?
o The Should vs Could voices in our heads – “Should” pushes guilt and “Could” opens opportunity to say ‘yes’ or ‘no’.
o The ‘Messiah complex’ – “Apart from me nothing will get done.” “Your job is to represent the Messiah, not be the Messiah!” Donald Barnhouse
o “These are my disciples–my people, and they need / want / deserve me, not someone else.” You’re really not that important?
o “The Good Leader Syndrome” – adopting someone else’s pace, especially your heroes or your leaders.
o Climbing the organizational ladder for more power / influence – “My performance determines my future, therefore, I will put in more hours, volunteer for all duties, and be sure to quietly remind others of my sacrifice for the cause/team.”
o Lack of moral courage – “Everyone else is doing it, so I must do it too.”
o Self-martyrdom – “I can get by on less,” “I’m the exception,” or “I’ll be back to ‘normal’ soon.”

All of these lies lead to a ‘crash and burn’ ending that is not pretty. Whether we are burning ourselves out, wrecking our marriage, ignoring our children or driving those we lead to exhaustion – all is dishonoring to God. It is not honoring to Jesus or the cause of Jesus to associate Him with our own failings. That reality should stop us in our tracks and end the folly.

“Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.” Colossians 3:23 NLT

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